Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Christmas Carols for the Psychologically Challenged

1. Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear, the Voices, the Voices?

2. Amnesia - I Don't Remember If I'll Be Home for Christmas

3. Narcissistic - Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

4. Manic - Deck The Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and. . .

5. Multiple Personality Disorder - We Three Queens Disoriented Are

6. Paranoid - Santa Claus Is Coming to Get Us

7. Borderline Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, You Better Not Shout, I'm Gonna Cry, and I'll Not Tell You Why

8. Full Personality Disorder - Thoughts of Roasting You On an Open Fire

9. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells

10. Agoraphobia - I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House

11. Senile Dementia - Walking In a Winter Wonderland Miles from MyHouse in My Slippers and Robe

12. Oppositional Defiant Disorder - I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House

13. Social Anxiety Disorder - Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate

14. Attention Deficit Disorder - We Wish You......Hey Look!! It's Snowing!!!

Content credit: Shalee's Diner. (And chances are that she borrowed it from someone else...) Disclaimer: My sincerest apologizes to anyone suffering from any of the illnesses listed above. No offense meant with this post. So have a good laugh and then meditate. . . and/ or medicate as necessary.


Elizabeth said...

Oh, gosh - LOVE these! Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas to you in Russia!

Eileen said...

Hello Elizabeth, Hilarious, aren't they? Wish I could take credit for writing them myself! ;) Happy New Year to you and yours!